by Rhiannon Hall
Green has no boundaries, it’s a promise of purpose. Green-lit, my pillow comfort. Green light on a phone cries – new emails, new Google Classroom posts. Ever- green with students’ all-hour questions. Students wring their hands with uncertain futures. Green is me blinking morse code – I’m here, I’m trying. Green urgent in my hands. Green like the sound of an old dog crying, knowing no amount of blankets and pillows will ease pain. Green, a beacon to this addict waiting for green. Green control, a job to do.
On my old Samsung a little green or blue flashing light meant that I had a new notification. During the period of Covid19 lockdowns in Australia I downloaded Google Classroom (an education app for teachers to communicate with their students). I also had my school email set up on my phone. I felt this need to be contactable 24/7. School and my students invaded every space of my house. I could feel myself slipping into an anxious state where every other aspect of my life came to a stop because I couldn’t find the motivation or self-belief to keep up. The only thing I felt capable of was being available for my students, many of whom were asking for support with their own mental health issues.
Rhiannon Hall is an English teacher, who has been sharing her love of poetry for the past seven years through a poetry club at the high school she teaches at. She has had poems published in BlazeVOX20 (online journal); Seeking the Sun: Australian Poetry 2012, Central Coast Poets Inc.; Seeking Horizons: SCWC Anthology 2014, South Coast Writers Centre Inc.; and Cordite Poetry Review. Rhiannon has also published an essay in Axon: Creative Explorations (online journal). She enjoys workshopping her poetry with a group of Southern Highlands poets. Rhiannon is currently undertaking a Doctor of Creative Arts at Western Sydney University.