acceptance of a diminished life making the most of it taking control existing grimly by your own rules it’s a lifestyle choice been inside for years (advanced agoraphobia shouldn’t be seen as a disorder) but don’t expect the joy that comes with spontaneity no need to go shopping everything’s delivered & communications & entertainment are in-house email facebook dvds pay tv & streaming repeats of Dr Who Silent Witness & Vera no plans or possibilities your priority to remain safe if you move away from stasis an attack could be imminent when the sun comes up ignore it bright days are not for you remain in bed leave it to others to influences things outside their homes in the past there were difficulties dyslexia critical parents extreme shyness ‘never had a bestie’ ‘I thought I didn’t fit in’ one day you might take a risk surging dauntless down the stairs to the street smell the fresh grass the sound of water bubbling among the hydrangeas see the gate ajar open to the crazy path behind the shivering hedge & you look around ‘is there someone i can talk to’
Carolyn Gerrish is a Sydney poet, For many years she has been a creative writing teacher in the community. Her work has been widely published in Australia and overseas. She has read her work at many venues, including the Brett Whiteley Gallery and the Sydney Writers Festival. Her sixth collection of poetry, ‘Collision with the Shadow’ was published in 2022 by Ginninderra Press.